LEDGEND OF THE FISHCAKE WARRIORS PART V: LOCI BROKILI THE COOL AND FUNKY DISCO BREAKER
June 16th 2007 05:45
Loci Brokili the cool and funky disco breaker went through the pet food isle.
“Mmm…Pet food” He said with a gleam in his eye. He had never told anyone, but eating Unlucky Dog dog food twice a day was the reason he was such a funky disco breaker. He grabbed a can and tried to pry the lid off. Suddenly a voice boomed out of the loudspeaker.
“LOCI BROKILI THE COOL AND FUNKY DISCO BREAKER, THIS IS LITTLE SISTER”
“Wha- Arrrrg!!!” Said Loci Brokili the cool and funky disco breaker who had just crushed his hand with the dog food can. He looked up at the loudspeaker.
“MADE YOU LOOK” said the voice, and went away forever.
“Arrrrrg” Said Loci Brokili the cool and funky disco breaker angrily. The loudspeaker creaked. Loci Brokili the cool and funky disco breaker looked up again. A dead frog that was hiding on top of it jumped off and landed at his feet.
“Looooci Broooookili, Iiii am Naaaaat the froooog!”
“That’s nice,” said Loci Brokili the cool and funky disco breaker, still trying to pry the lid off.
“Youuuuuuu will beeeeeeeeee visited by threeeeeeeee ghosts before you leave thiiiis isle”
“That’s nice” Said Loci Brokili the cool and funky disco breaker, banging the can of Unlucky Dog on the side of a Stop Cat cat food tin.
“Your not even liiiistening to me, aaaaare you?”
“That’s nice” Said Loci Brokili the cool and funky disco breaker, who wasn’t even listening to him was he.
“Fine. Then I’ll talk normally. You’re a bum Loci Brokili the cool and funky disco breaker. In fact I’m not going to call you Loci Brokili the cool and funky disco breaker. I’ll call you Loci. No actually, I’ll call you Snotjuice. Mner!”
“That’s nice,” said Loci Brokili the cool and funky disco breaker, turning the can upside down.
“Goodbye, Snotjuce!”
“That’s nice” Said Loci Brokili the cool and funky disco breaker, finding out that he was holding the can the wrong way round. He pulled the ring-pull tab on the top and ate the can of Unlucky Dog dog food with ravish.
“Mmmm….yummy”
He walked quickly through the isle. A fat fairy appeared in front of him and poked his eye.
“Ow!” Said Loci
“We interrupt your program with the following announcement. The story ‘The Legend of The Fishcake warriors’ was briefly taken over by aliens who crossed out Loci
He walked quickly through the isle. A fat fairy appeared in front of him and poked his eye.
“Ow!” Said Loci
“I’m the ghost of the past. I’m here to show you some of your past” She said and pulled a small TV from her knickers. Loci
“I don’t feel so good” she said, and with an earth shattering POP she melted into a huge lump of mashed potato. The fairy turned the TV off and ran off to isle four hundred and seventy-two where she gave it to Mr Phipps the gardener who fed it to his African carnivorous daises. Loci
“I’m the ghost of the present. This is the present. Pretty groovy eh?”
“I reckon” Said Loci
“I’m the ghost, o’ the jolly future y’know” It pressed it’s button and showed an image of Loci
“NO! IT CANNOT BE TRUE!” He cried and in his haste to escape the isle ran into a container of beetroot juice that fell and knocked him over, covering him with beetroot juice. He got up, feeling rather stupid, and left the isle.
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